Mouth Pain

I am prone to canker sores from time to time and I just deal with them and let them heal when they will - usually in about a week. Well, I developed what I thought was a canker sore behind the backmost molar on the right side, on the inside (tongue side) about 4 weeks ago. I thought it was starting to heal and then I had chemo on July 6th, which set it back. It got painful again but seemed to start to heal again before my last chemo session on July 20th. This week it got so painful that it was even hard to drink water because when you drink, the tongue actually puts pressure on the jaw at that very spot. So, though I had an appointment to see the dentist on Monday, I decided to make an "emergency call" and go see him today. I did feel silly taking his time on a Saturday to deal with what I thought was a canker sore (there's not much they can do about those) but I wanted to make sure there wasn't an infection developing.

I'm glad I went today to see him instead of waiting another couple of days.

At first he thought it was a canker sore too because it was white like a canker sore. Then he touched it with his little metal tool. Then he pressed and tapped on it. Then he announced that it was a little bone fragment sticking partly out, causing all that pain, like a splinter.

Why did I have a bone fragment sticking out of my gum line? It's a mystery. I suppose it could be a remnant from when my wisdom teeth were taken out when I was in high school. It would be unusual for a fragment to sit still for 20 years, though. He said usually they become a problem within a year or two. I am returning to the office on Monday so he can take X-rays to see what else is going on in there. According to him this is highly unusual and it would be good to see if there are any more fragments floating around.

Bummer I didn't think to get a photo of it before I left.

Garden Progression

I have uploaded some new pics of the garden progress, taken 7/23/09, along with notes in the captions. This link will take you directly to the album.

Enjoy the pics!

Mistake Made This Week

I was feeling so good last week after my ginger experiment that I forgot to take my anti-nausea drug, Emend, this time. I'm supposed to take the first pill 1 hour before chemo starts. I was halfway through the infusion before I remembered it. So, I asked Dave to bring it to me and I took it as soon as I could. Soon after, I went to the bathroom and while there did a "cough-burp" thing which brought up the pill. I saw it slither down the sink into the drain. Then, I was in full vomit mode, into the toilet.

Unfortunately, I was tossing up bile a few more times through the evening. It's not that I was nauseated. All of a sudden my stomach would start rolling and I'd better move fast. I couple of times I was carrying a trash can. Luckily.

Today I've felt week but no vomiting. I've tried to stay calm, still, and mostly sleep as much as I can. Another contributing factor is that my oncologist increased the 5-FU drug (the 46-hour take-home infusion) 10%. SO, the lack of the Emend coupled with more chemo was not a good combination.

Next time I'll remember the Emend. I only have 2 more of these to go.

Props To Canon

I've gotta give the Canon Camera corporation props. I had a Canon Power Shot S230, purchased probably 6 years ago. It started having problems with distortion on the LCD a year or so ago, which manifested on the final recorded image. The distortions got worse and worse until it got so annoying that I couldn't use the camera. Since Dave bought a new camera a year ago (which I'm not fond of) I was strongly discouraged from buying myself a new camera. I guess we already had a "family" camera. So, one way around this was to see about getting mine fixed. Granted, it was only 3.2 mega pixels, but it was good enough for me for so many years, so why not keep using it?

So, when I called Canon to see about repairing it, I was told that there was an "advisory" about a faulty chip that was a known issue with my camera model. This defective chip caused distortions such as the ones I was describing. I was advised to send it in and if it was determined to be the problem then they would fix it at no charge.

Well, it wasn't really as easy as that. They sent it back to me after replacing the "optical sensor" but the problem was still there.

Here are where the props come in: I called them again and after explaining that the problem had not been resolved they told me to send it back to them again. Since the camera is a few years old, however, they were not able to get the replacement chip anymore. So, their solution was to send me a replacement: A Power Shot SD790 IS. 10 mega pixels. Image stabilizers. Great camera!

Also, I now know that Canon has a loyalty upgrade program. If you call them and tell them what model you have, they will offer you a choice of several cameras to purchase at a discounted price.
After being treated so well, you bet I'll remain a loyal Canon customer!

A Few Garden Pics

Hi All!

I wanted to share a few pics of my garden.
These are my cherry tomatoes:
This is looking to be a very large tomato when it's done. The variety is "Copia":

Baby pumpkins are getting bigger!

Jalapeno peppers:

These heart-shaped tomatoes are "Cour di Bue":

What a beautiful rose! I don't know what kind this one is but I love it:

My giant sunflower. This one is probably 7-8 feet tall.

Its head seems too heavy for it. It has plenty of water.

As for me, I'm doing well this week. I finally got smart and decided to take ginger capsules before and during my chemo week this last time. And it really made a difference. No nausea at all, and I seemed to recover a couple of days sooner than usual.

PET Scan last week

A short note - last week I had a PET scan, and it was completely clear. In summary: "No abnormal metabolic activity… No demonstration metastasis." There is an MRI planned in 2 months. And every 2 months afterwards until who knows when?

By the way, the garden's doing fabulously. I'll take new pics soon. You should see the giant sunflower!

Garden - Photos Taken 6/30/09

I have uploaded some new pics of the garden progress, taken 6/30/09, along with notes in the captions. This link will take you directly to the album. My favorite pic is of the little baby pumpkin! Actually, here it is:

This week I'm doing pretty good. My stomach was upset until Tuesday. My sinuses were full of crud. That may be an allergy issue - maybe I'm more prone to developing allergic sensitivities while on chemo. Up to now, all my life I've escaped the allergy woes that I hear other people talking about.

There's really nothing new to report. I can keep repeating the other things I've said because this week was basically a repeat of two weeks ago. However, that would be boring. Mostly I just wanted to let everyone know that I'm alive and hanging in there. I know that prolonged silence can start a person to wonder.

Checking In

It's now Thursday, and I'm finally feeling fairly normal. Each session takes longer to recover from, it seems. I was functional by the weekend, but I was constantly tired. I did stuff, but I had to make myself keep moving. And mentally this is tough. When it's all done I want to take some time and just recover from the harshness of it all, and just chill for a while without the constant knowledge that in a few days I will be dragged down into a well. De-stress, if you will. I have been dealing with this since February of 2008 and I know I will some need decompression time. Luckily, I have pretty good support for that. And I don't think that's unreasonable. I think that most people need some recovery time after such a life-threatening and life-impacting thing such as what I have had to endure. Regarding work, I do intend to return to work. I just hope my co-workers don't take it personally if I don't rush back right away and take a little time to recover. The previous me always wanted to say and do the things that would please everyone else, sometimes to the detriment of what was best for me. But in this case I think that I should put myself first. It'll be better for everyone in the long run.

Garden Pics

I have uploaded some new pics of the garden progress, taken 6/15/09, along with notes in the captions. This link will take you directly to the album.

Summary For New Readers

I was thinking that as I direct new people to this blog I don't always tell them how this cancer stuff got started. So, here's a summary of how this all began:

It started out as colon cancer, discovered February 13, 2008. I had surgery to remove the tumor and underwent chemo from March - September. In December 2008 mets were found on my liver during a scan. I had surgery in January 2009 to remove them. I then started chemo again in February 2009. I hope to be finished at the end of August.

So, that's the "quick and dirty" to get everyone up to speed.

Round 7

OK, here I am in the middle of Round 7. I guess it's good to be more than halfway through this. It'll get easier to see the end though when I get closer to it.

Monday when I came home I just headed to bed as usual. Around 6:00 or so Dave offered me some Jell-O. My stomach felt unsettled but I said OK, I'd try it. Such a sweet husband. I was so tired that I didn't want to open my eyes and the chewing and the swallowing of the Jell-O was as much as I could manage. He spoon fed me the whole thing. What a wonderful guy. Later he brought me an Ensure. Between the Jell-O and the Ensure I was feeling better. Not good enough to get up, but good enough to go to sleep. I actually slept well that night. Actually I was able to go to sleep when I asked Dave to come up and lie down with me for a while. Just lying with my head on his chest, hearing him breathe and hearing his heart beat quietened things down inside my head and allowed me to sleep.

Tuesday morning I got up, drank a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice. And then a small glass of chocolate milk. Read the paper, then headed to bed, where I was for most of the day. David brought me another Jell-O and Ensure meal. Later I got up and went downstairs, drank some water, ate 1/2 of a tamale (which I helped make on Saturday!) and watched TV. When I went to bed I was able to sleep well again.

Today I woke up, drank the OJ that was waiting for me beside my bed. Then went downstairs for some chocolate milk. Read the paper, showered and then we went to have my pump removed. I came home, went to bed to watch some TV and took a nap (I also ate a vegetable tamale with some salsa and sour cream). Here I am now updating things and drinking another glass of milk.

Last time I started feeling a bit blue-sy, a little depressed. It's because out of each 2-week cycle I have more bad days than I have good days. The oncologist offered me some anti-depressant pills but for now I will decline them. I don't want to commit to taking chemicals for 6 months when I will be finished with this in 3. And I don't want to even out my mood, so that not only do I not feel "down" I also would not feel "up". I don't want to miss out on feeling happy. So, I'll just see how it goes and resist the drugs.

Everything that I am feeling is normal, I am told.

Trying To Rally

For some reason I just haven't recovered completely yet after that last round of chemo. Usually I start feeling like my old self by the following Tuesday. I was expecting it to be Wednesday this week since my chemo was delayed a day due to Memorial Day. But here it is, Thursday, and I still feel kind of sluggish. My appetite's not great, especially for breakfast. Sleep's hard to come by so I get up tired already. So, I wake up tired, my stomach fells unsettled, so it's hard to eat breakfast. Therefore my energy's low for the rest of the day. Then I just hope I sleep well the next night and wake up refreshed, like someone hit a "reset" button. But it hasn't happened yet this morning. Maybe tomorrow...

I still cannot neglect the things I have to do. Because even though I feel pretty beat up this week it's nothing compared to next week. So I know I won't get anything done next week. And I've put some things off for several weeks already and just need to get things done. Like today: I'm cleaning up the overgrown lamb's ear in the front. The dead brown leaves have to be removed from the bottom of each plant. If I had done this a few weeks ago it wouldn't have been such a big job. But they got so overgrown it's taking me a few hours just to do this one job. And if I don't do it now then it's just going to look worse and be a bigger job later on. So, I have to muster up the energy and get it done now to avoid a bigger, longer job later.

Also, something I had put off for several weeks finally got done this week. I dedicated 2 days to cleaning the windows in our house. I hosed down the 1st floor windows on the outside and cleaned the class and the window sills. The 2nd floor windows took a little more time since I couldn't reach them with the jet spray and the squeegee. So I opened them up (the open inwards like a door, luckily) and wiped down the sills and the window frames and then cleaned the glass with Windex. It was a lot of work but the windows look so much better.

Now I am working outside, cleaning up the lamb's ears. I have a couple of things I hope to get to in the garden . Which is coming along nicely, by the way! Tomorrow I will gear up for a dinner party we are having on Saturday. Some of our friends are coming over and we are going to try our hands at making tamales. Luckily someone's also making enchiladas, so we are guaranteed to have something to eat. ;-)

Resting

I am lying here on my sofa, posting from my phone for the first time. So it may be a short post! This week was rough. My chemo was Tuesday instead of Monday due to Memorial Day. So I went in on Tuesday, saw the doc. Then went into the infusion center. Not exactly my favorite place to be. I chose a seat and waited for the poisons. The nurse hooked up the Aloxi/Decadron combination (for nausea) and let it run in. Then she hooked up the CPT-11 and the leucovorin and let that stuff run. I was told that there wasn't enough Avastin on hand so they decided to give that to me on Thursday when I returned to get unhooked. So after my cocktail finished then she hooked up my 5-FU which infuses over 46 hours. I came home on Tuesday and felt just aweful. It's not that I was experiencing nausea or throwing up. The drugs take care of that. I just overall felt horrible, very fatigued. I really don't want to do this anymore, yet I have 6 more to go.

My appetite does funny things. Sometimes I feel like eating a salad. Sometimes it's a Taco Bell taco. Or tortilla chips and dour cream. Or spicy V8. Or regular V8. Or even Fritos and spicy bean dip. Mostly it's either really clean flavors or it's strong (sour cream) or salty (chips) flavors. Those break through the numbness of my tongue. The clean flavors don't confuse it.

Well that's what's on my mind right now. I just wanted to share that with you.

Garden Pics Updated 5/25/09

I have uploaded some new pics of the garden progress, taken 5/25/09, along with notes in the captions. This link will take you directly to the album.

How Chemo Affects My Energy

Well, for those of you who are wondering how I'm doing, let's just say that I'm very busy right now. When I have chemo (as a reminder it's every other week) I have absolutely no energy and I feel as if I will never have energy again. I don't want to do anything. I don't want to chat online. I especially don't want to talk to anyone in person or on the phone. Carrying on a conversation of any kind makes me so tired. Just putting together coherent sentences drains me. So, I hide under a rock. That's why those of you who tell me I look great or I am so strong only see that part of me. I don't really let anyone see the other part. Not because I want to spare you. Not at all. I want to spare myself the energy drain. I usually won't even answer the phone. Sometimes I can send out a couple of cell phone texts but that's usually the extent of my abilities.

So, this goes on for about a week. My chemotherapy sessions are usually always on Mondays and by the weekend I am feeling like perhaps I can got out for short excursions, but then return home to nap. Usually I don't feel like my normal self until the following Tuesday. Then I start running in circles, cramming everything into the few days that I have.

My next chemo is on Tuesday the 26th. I get an extra day this week because of Memorial Day. That's great, until I remember that I will get one less day the next cycle, assuming I return to Mondays. I like Mondays for my treatments because it's possible for me to be somewhat social by Saturday if I get enough rest.

I have 7 cycles remaining. Then the MD will order an MRI every 3 months to keep an eye on things. I really want this to be over.

I'll try to update this more often. I may start to repeat myself but I understand you would probably like an update anyway. I appreciate that you check in here to see how things are going.

Next blog post: Updated garden pics!

PET Scan Results

Just a quick note while I have some residual energy. Last Tuesday (May 5) I had a PET scan performed. This past Monday I got the result. No new tumors, lesions, or anything. Just some inflammation in my abdominal area from the surgery. So all is well. My oncologist did say that she would like for me to do 6 months (12 cycles) of chemo to help ensure nothing comes back. I've done 5. I guess I can do 7 more. Ugh! And I will have an MRI every 3 months as follow up.

On to brighter things: The garden. This weekend I will take new photos. We (David was a BIG help) planted the 5 tomato plants, 3 pie pumpkin plants, and the 2 squash plants that we started from seed. We also put down a lot of compost (mulch) to help keep the ground cool. So far it's looking great and I do expect to get some nice harvesting eventually. I still have to plant the okra (they are in a seed starter tray) and when I do they will do very well. I have learned that I like starting seeds. That way I transplant little guys that have a head start against the bugs and critters.

Garden Pics Updated

I have uploaded some new pics of the garden progress, along with notes in the captions. This link will take you directly to the album. I have added some detail in the captions so that you know what you are looking at!

New Mediport

OK, so now maybe I'll take a few minutes and get this blog up to speed. Last Sunday David and I returned from our vacation to the Caribbean. Soon I'll upload some photos from our trip. We left on Friday, April 3rd for San Juan, Puerto Rico. From there we journeyed to Bridgetown, Barbados aboard the Silver Cloud, part of the Silver Sea cruise line. When the cruise was over we spent two nights in Barbados and then two nights in South Beach, Miami. Sunday April 19th we finally returned home. After two weeks away, it was nice to be home!

Before our trip I had my 3rd chemo treatment and then had my PICC line removed. I couldn't very well go to the Caribbean with tubes hanging out of my arm! I also worked frantically in the garden, getting everything planted that needed to be planted as well as setting up the irrigation so that they would get watered automatically via a timer. All that work caused me to strain the newly healed muscles in my abdomen so I spent the cruise worried about the painful spots but after taking it easy since then I'm happy to report that the discomfort is gone. I still have some garden to set up but I will wrangle David into doing anything that requires any straining.

A couple of days ago I had another mediport put into my chest. This will be used for the remaining chemotherapy infusions instead of the PICC line. This time I consulted with a surgeon (who is known for installing pediatric ports in his patients) to ensure that I didn't get some huge device implanted like before. I am pleased to report that this one is so much less noticeable than the first one. So, I start chemo again next week with my brand new port. Yay? Don't know if I should rejoice or not.

OK, back to the trip: Usually David writes up a trip report, sprinkled with his brand of humor. Hopefully he will find time to write this one as well. If he does so I will post it here for all to see. David has found himself to be very busy since we returned because he got some surprising news the evening of our return: Most of the people in his work division had been laid off and those remaining have been "reorganized". Luckily he didn't get laid off but now he has a new boss and is trying to figure out what his new role is. This week has been interesting but eventually things will settle out. I'm just glad that he still has a job. Right now's not the time to be job-searching since so many people have been laid off in his industry lately.

Me? I am lucky that the health care field is growing. When I'm ready to go back to work (after chemo, I suppose) my job will still be waiting for me, I'm told. I do have a great boss and wonderful peers.

Back From Vacation

Just a short note to say that the lack of posts this time was for a good reason. I've been in the Caribbean! I'll post details soon.

It was dark when I got home so I wasn't able to get a good look at the garden but it looks like things are moving along out there. I gotta get more lights out there!

On Tuesday I get another mediport put in and chemo will resume next week. Just in case you were wondering.

Now I have to unpack.

Garden's Almost Finished!

I figured it was time to post again. Right now I'm feeling great. With this chemo cocktail I am tired longer than the last time and don't really start to feel completely normal until Tuesday of the week following chemo (when chemo's on Monday). Anyway, when I'm tired posting seems beyond me. It just takes way too much mental energy to put so many words together! This week, once my energy returned, I was working nonstop in the garden. I finished setting up the irrigation, added blackeye peas, some pepper plants, a couple of tomato plants, early corn, late corn, and sunflowers. I also planted marigolds and seeds of nasturtiums and borage. I read that these three flowers help keep bad insects away.

Here are a couple of pics of the garden today:All I have to do now is wait for the ground to warm up a little more and plant seeds for okra. Also, at the end of the month the asparagus crowns are expected at our local nursery. I will put 6 of them in. Plus I have seedlings growing for a couple of heirloom tomatoes, pie pumpkins, and yellow crookneck squash.

I can't wait for stuff to start growing and for my garden to turn green!